


we don’t love like flowers

by rosasdeesperanca



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Charles Xavier has a Ph.D in Adorable, Erik is a Sweetheart, M/M, absolute and complete fluff, erik is your typical stupid gay, poetry and flowers because i love poetry and flowers, the power of love and flowers i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-01-31 13:54:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21447280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosasdeesperanca/pseuds/rosasdeesperanca
Summary: Erik has a serious crush on his florist whom he buys flowers from for that sole reason. But maybe luck and a forgotten lunch will finally help him to make a move
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier
Comments: 6
Kudos: 62





	we don’t love like flowers

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chriks](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chriks/gifts).

> hellooooo this one is a gift for my dear friend tatiana, i love them and i wish them all the happiness in the world

Erik had always loved this poem from Rainer Maria Rilke. The one that started with “Wie soll ich meine Seele halten, daß  
sie nicht an deine rührt? Wie soll ich sie hinheben über dich zu andern Dingen?” He didn’t know many poems by heart but he knew this one, it was his mother’s favourite and it was his too. Sometimes when he passed by the flower shop, he thought about this poem, he thought about the owner of the flower shop, he thought about the blue in his eyes, his cute t-shirts, the way he smiled when he made a bouquet and he always ended up coming in and buying flowers. It had been almost two months since he entered the shop for the first time, to buy a plant for his colleague. He ended up stumbling on his words when he saw the florist. It had never happened before, even when he was still in high school, to be honest, Erik hadn’t liked many people in high school. He worked to provide for his family and love was the last thing on his mind. Then he moved to the United States, he worked to get a job that would excite him, make him live comfortably and most importantly something that would help him provide for his mother. Now he was thirty, with a good, important job, he had a car, he wore suits and still he found himself having a crush. Something he didn’t even have as a teenager. 

After the plant, he came back. In fact, he came back many times. Usually, twice a week. He sometimes chose to take another way to his apartment so he wouldn’t pass by the shop and find himself there again. It was truly an addiction, a futile addiction but still one he wouldn’t give up on. It wasn’t his fault really, he was so perfect. His eyes, his voice, his lips, his hands, his hair, his smile. Erik never had a type and he understood why, the cute man from the flower shop was his type. He knew his name but he never dared to call him like that in his head, it was too tempting. Too personal somehow to call him Charles. Like they were friends, like they could be more, like he was his. Because he wasn’t and probably never will be. If only he had the guts to ask him out, to give himself a chance to be properly happy instead of just being content. Maybe, then he would have a chance. But so far he could only smile and go along with everything Charles said. Thankfully for him, he was incredibly friendly, they talked every time he bought flowers. Erik had learned that he had a dog, that he loved to read, old movies, rain. He had learned so many random things. Sometimes, he really liked talkative people. Or it was probably only Charles. 

Every night when he came home, he had flowers standing proudly in his vase. Always different, sometimes roses, tulips, sunflowers, poppies, lilies, buttercups, orchids. He had them all. Always with different colours, smells. Erik had never been passionate about flowers but he could understand the hype around them, it was nice to have something that was pretty and smelled good when you came back from a long day of work. They died soon of course and that always gave him an excuse to buy new ones. 

Today, he was in a hurry for work, he lacked sleep recently and had overslept. He still arrived in time and sighed. Erik loved his job, he fought hard for it, he had worked two jobs for so long just to pay for his studies and to help his mother. He felt an inner sense of relief to know he could afford a decent life for him and his mother. It was everything he had ever wanted. Being able to make sure they would have something to eat, they could pay the rent. He didn’t live with his mother but just the thought of her not struggling anymore brought peace to him. Many things weren’t right in his life but this was. Knowing his mother didn’t have to worry every minute of her life was the greatest thing he could think of. She deserved some rest, some calm. 

When he left work that evening, he knew exactly where he would go, to his favourite flower shop, to bring a little sunshine in his life. Even when the sun had already set. He was happy to notice he was the only one in the shop, Charles greeted him happily “Oh it’s my favourite customer! What do you need today?”

Erik tried not to take it so literally, he was just probably being nice and doing his job. But he still felt flattered and smiled “Honestly, just surprise me.” 

Charles walked to him with a big smile “Wonderful. Okay I have a little idea for the colours.”

Erik watched as Charles picked flowers there and there to make a bouquet. He picked warm colours, red, orange and yellow. Very autumnal. He could have guessed as much. Charles carefully cut the flowers, arranged them with a beautiful paper and red ribbon. And because Charles was Charles, he started to make conversation “You must really love that boyfriend or girlfriend of yours.”

Erik opened his mouth without a single word coming out of his mouth for a moment before he could say “I don’t have one.”

“Oh...” Charles chuckled softly “I’m sorry, I trespass privacy sometimes.”

“No, it’s okay. I just buy them for myself. Once for my colleague but usually it’s for me.” 

“That’s wonderful! Men very rarely buy flowers for themselves. It’s always for their wives, girlfriends, sisters, mothers. You see the picture. Sometimes, they buy flowers for other men and that’s really cool.” He smiled “But it’s even cooler that you buy flowers for yourself.” 

Erik smiled back “It’s great that you didn’t assume I was straight.”

He sighed “Ah, tell me about it. I’m not very straight myself.”

Yes, yes! Erik thought, at least now he knew he had the slightest chance “We have something in common.”

“And our love for flowers.” 

“Yeah.” Erik nodded. Even though he never really cared about flowers before. He couldn’t tell Charles he was there for him, maybe after their wedding. Or their second child. 

“Well...” He gave him the bouquet “These flowers really are perfect for you.”

“You chose them.” Erik laughed. 

“I’m very dedicated to my work.” 

Erik smiled shyly “You are.” 

Charles smiled back “Have a good evening.”

“You as well.” He picked his flowers and left. He really wished he had the nerves to ask him out. But it seemed, he wasn’t ready yet. 

When he was home, he carefully put his flowers in a vase. The ones he bought last time hadn’t wilt yet, he properly realised how needy he was then. That he would find any excuse just to see him for ten minutes, it was starting to be ridiculous but he was too smitten to care. The minutes were worth it. He really wondered what he was doing now, he knew he lived above the shop, he told him once, that it was a really nice place to live and that he was never late like this. He was probably on his couch with his dog, watching or reading something with a cup of tea. He was judging by the accent, it was a very cliché thing to think but he was pretty sure he loved tea. He sighed, he really spent too much time thinking about someone whose only relationship he had with was that he sold him flowers, nothing more. But still, he truly believed they could work out, they could be good together. Maybe it was just him projecting what he saw in him more than anything else. He was convinced Charles was a good person, someone his mother would like. He wished his mother didn’t live miles away, she would probably get him a date in a minute. She had never been able to keep anything to herself. 

He fell asleep on his couch that night, watching an old tv show and eating noodles. The next morning, he was feeling strangely joyful. Like he knew something good would happen. It was so rare, that he barely recognised himself in the mirror, he hadn’t looked so happy in months. He shrugged, he didn’t know why but he would take it over feeling sad, any day. He liked this feeling, barely noticing the cold outside. Smiling for no reason, not being so concerned about everything. It felt great, too great for him to overthink it. So he didn’t. He arrived to his job with a big smile and all of his colleagues looked at him like he just discovered a cure for cancer but he didn’t care. It was just a good day, it happened sometimes. Not a lot but it seemed today was one. 

It was stupid, really. But Erik couldn’t stop thinking about Charles, no matter how many times he reminded himself that he was just selling him flowers, because he always came into his shop, because he had a stupid crush on him. And it was all him, no matter how many times he reminded himself of this, he still pretty much couldn’t stop thinking about him. He occupied most of his mind, so much that he forgot he brought no lunch with him and had to go to the grocery store during his break. It seemed that it was fate because as he was trying to find a sandwich, someone tapped on his shoulder, he looked up to see Charles smiling at him brightly “Hey! Forgot your lunch?”

“That’s exactly what happened. But ‘forgot to make one’ would be a better statement.” 

Charles laughed “Can definitely relate to that. It’s really nice to see you outside of the shop.”

Yes, Erik thought, definitely nice. He only nodded, he had to keep it cool “What brings you here?”

“Chocolate crave.” He showed him the bars “Not very proud of it but...” he shrugged. 

Erik smiled “You know what they say ‘treat yourself’” he didn’t even know why he said that, he certainly never treated himself. 

“Oh, this is the phrase that I live by, maybe a little too much sometimes.” He laughed, scratching the back of his head. 

Erik thought that he should live by it more and he finally found some courage in him “Hm...” He took a breath “This might come out of the blue but would you like to go out with me some time?” Unfortunately it hit him too fast and he had to add “Just as friends if you’d like.”

Charles’ face was only brighting up “Of course, I’m free this evening if you want.” 

Wow, that easy, he thought, that fast. He couldn’t believe he only had to ask. For a moment he couldn’t speak or move which made Charles worry as he was softly touching his arm “Erik, are you okay?”

“Y-yes. Don’t worry. I was just thinking about something. That evening is perfect.”

“Wonderful. Where should we meet?” He asked joyfully. 

“Your shop, at seven?”

“Perfect. I’ll see you there.” He left him with a smile. 

Erik took another long breath. What just had happened? Did he just got a date with him or did he just hallucinate this? It seemed too unreal and he might have scared a few people with the way he smiled. Did he just turn lucky all of the sudden? He certainly wasn’t going to complain. His day was spent like a fever dream, he couldn’t remember what he did or what he said. Only looking at his watch every two minutes. His mother would probably laugh if she saw him being this excited and giddy. It wasn’t like him but he really didn’t feel like himself today, he didn’t miss it all that much. Being happy felt good. Thinking about the evening that was coming felt good. He did feel lighter, he was slowly becoming the main character from a rom com but did it matter, when it felt so right? He didn’t even have to ask himself, he knew the answer. 

At 7pm, he found Charles in front of his shop wearing a big smile and holding a single rose in his hand. He looked so handsome with his light blue sweater and black jacket, Erik couldn’t help but smile too. 

“For me?” He pointed at the rose. 

“No.” He looked around “For my date, have you seen him?”

Erik rolled his eyes “What’s the meaning for yellow?”

“Actually, there’s several meanings but I used it for new beginnings.” He gave him the flower. 

“Oh, to new beginnings then. What do you want to do?”

“I thought about walking in the park. We can get to know each other better, it’s a nice place and I truly hate to sit in a busy restaurant. You can barely hear the other person talking. It’s too formal.” 

“I always thought so too. But it’s what’s done so...” He shrugged. 

“So you do it.” He finished. 

“I can cook though, if you’d like.” 

He smiled “I would like that, yes.” 

They started to walk to the park, Erik holding his flower carefully. When they were there, it was getting so cold outside, he could see Charles shivering a little. He stopped in front of him “Here take my scarf.”

“Don’t worry, I’m fine.” He smiled. 

“I wasn’t asking.” 

“It was an order then?” He rose his eyebrows. 

Erik nodded as he arranged the scarf, turning it gently around his neck. He smiled at him “That’s better.”

“Ah, a true gentleman from a Jane Austen novel.” 

“Not even close.” He laughed. 

He looked at him so softly, no one ever looked at him like this “Let’s sit there.”

Erik sat next to him “Favourite spot?”

Charles nodded “You can see the lake, the ducks and swans swimming slowly like they have all the time in the world. When I wake up early, which is not that often.” He chuckled “I like to sit there and watch the sunrise. It’s so calm in the morning, it’s easier to think and feel.”

It was becoming a problem because Erik was more and more smitten by the minute. He only wanted to hide him away in a warm blanket, he didn’t know anyone else who would say that. He rather felt special to spend his evening with him “I like mornings too. I usually wake up early, mostly out of habit. I run for a few miles and then I drink a cup of coffee and I feel like the day can start.”

“I knew you were running.” He smirked. 

“You checked me out?” He frowned. 

“To be perfectly honest, yes.” He admitted “It was hard not to.”

Erik smiled to himself “Wow.” 

“Let’s play a game. I ask you something, you ask me something.” He turned to Erik. 

“Anything I would like to know?”

“Anything.” Charles confirmed “You can start.”

“Okay...Where are you from?” 

“State of New York. Yeah, I know you thought England. Truth is my parents were just English. I lived there for a while, not long.” 

“Were?” Erik frowned. 

“They’re both dead. It’s been a while.” He looked away. 

“I’m sorry. My father died when I was thirteen.”

“Mine when I was eight...Wow that must be the saddest first date of all time.” He sighed “Okay my first question, what’s your favourite book?” 

“Probably Anna Karenina.” He didn’t hesitate “Yours?”

“Pride And Prejudice. I think I’ve read it twenty times.”

“If you could go anywhere, where would you go?”

Charles looked thoughtful “A flower field in Ireland.” 

“Sounds nice.” He looked at Charles and smiled. 

Charles smiled back “Your favourite language?”

“Hm, French or German.” 

“And you can speak both?” 

Erik nodded “Fluently. Well, German is my mother tongue, nothing impressive there.” 

“Still impressed.” 

“Do you have a middle name?”

Charles nodded “I do, it’s Francis.”

“Sounds fancy.” Erik remarked. 

“Fancy family.” He shrugged “Do you have one?”

“Magnus.”

“Sounds German.” 

“German family.” He echoed. 

Charles laughed “Good one. Have you ever been in love?”

“I don’t think so. I definitely loved people but I don’t think I was ever in love. You?”

He sighed “I thought I was. But I don’t think it should make you feel so sad to be in love. I think that being in love should feel like you are cared for, cherished. Not like you could fall apart at any second. I guess, I’m waiting for a love that feels like this.”

“I think that I do too.” Erik smiled softly. 

“Okay, final question. Very very important. Your favourite song?”

“Tough one. The Long And Winding Road by The Beatles or Exit Music by Radiohead.” 

“Sad but good choices.” 

“Yours?” 

“Definitely Heroes by David Bowie. I have the only good memories of my teenage years attached to this song.” He smiled looking down at his joined hands. 

“It’s a great song.” Erik confirmed “You seem cold again, maybe we should head back to my place.”

Charles nodded “Yes. That would be better.”

They both stood up at the same time, looking at each other, smiling. Charles was right, that was better than a crowded restaurant even though they were both freezing. It felt nice to be alone, share something personal without tons of noises and people. They walked side by side again and Erik had to ask “Would you mind if I held your hand?”

Charles shook his head “No, not at all. But it’s really cold.” 

Erik intertwined their fingers “Less cold now.” 

“A perfect gentleman, definitely.”

The moment felt too perfect, too beautiful for him. It was cliché to think he had never felt like this but it was true, he had never felt like this. Like a moment was flying above him and filling him with love and peace like this moment did. He tried to remember everything. To the smallest detail. He tried to capture everything. 

When they arrived in his apartment, Charles looked around with a little smile “My place is definitely not as tidy.”

“I like when things are in order.”

“I can see that.” He rose an eyebrow “So, what are you going to cook?” He sat on the sofa. 

“Salmon with vegetables is okay for you?”

“Perfect. I love salmon.”

“Make yourself at home.” Erik left to the kitchen. 

“But keep things in order.” Charles added. 

Erik shook his head, laughing “Preferably, yes.” He put the flower in his vase and he focused on his task, he was definitely trying to impress there. He was good at cooking, he wasn’t going to mess this up. He was going to make the best salmon he had ever tasted, it was tonight’s challenge. He watched Charles from the other room, opening the book he had been reading. He really needed to ask him if he liked Rilke later. 

He hadn’t cooked for anyone in years, his last relationship which didn’t bring him the comfort Charles talked about. He always had to cook, he liked it though. It was one of the only good aspects of said relationship, cooking something good so they wouldn’t order something unhealthy every time. But cooking for Charles felt different, appeasing, almost peaceful. He wasn’t in a hurry, he wasn’t slow either. It was just the right rhythm, like he knew exactly what pace to follow. When it was ready, he called for Charles and they sat together at the table. 

“It looks amazing! Are you sure you’re not a professional cook?” He said with big eyes, looking at the colourful plate. 

“Pretty sure. I hope it tastes as great as it looks.” 

Charles took his first bite, his eyes opening even more “That’s definitely the best thing I have ever tasted.”

Erik could hear angels sing “Thank you. I’m glad you like it.”

“Like it? I could write entire sonnets about this salmon. In fact, I am writing them mentally, as we speak.” 

Erik didn’t remember the last time he laughed so carefreely “Should I leave you with the salmon?”

“Yes, please.” 

They kept eating in silence, Erik smiled at every reaction from Charles. He was really happy that he made something that he loved and have him feel so comfortable in his home. He didn’t imagine their first date going so well, in fact until today he didn’t imagine a date at all. It still felt a little unreal but when he looked at him, he could feel it was only the beginning of something. He properly understood the meaning of the flower now. A new beginning fit them perfectly. 

Later, they were seating on the sofa, watching a documentary about otters. Turned out, Charles knew a lot about otters. Erik was rather fascinated, Charles seemed to know so much about so many subjects. He took this opportunity to ask him “I saw you reading when I was cooking, do you like Rilke?”

Charles nodded and turned to him “Yes, Letters to a Young Poet is one of my favourite books. I remember reading it when I was seventeen and understanding life much better.”

“When I was twelve I learned one of his poems by heart and I read it to my mother for her birthday. It was nothing really but she was so happy when I did.” It was the first time he ever anyone about it. He rarely opened up, mostly not so fast but he knew it had been the right thing to do when he saw the most sincere smile on Charles’ smile. 

“She must be really important to you.” 

He nodded “She is the best person I know.” 

“Does she live far away from you?” He tilted his head, looking at him affectionately. 

“Yes, she went back to Germany four years ago. I visit as often as I can but I still miss her.”

Charles took his hand, caressing it softly “I’m sure she’s very proud of you.” 

“That’s how she ends every phone call.” 

He smiled and intertwined their fingers again. It was as if they were meant to fit perfectly, it was ridiculous how right it felt. They both looked at their joined hands on the sofa and chuckled softly when they looked up at the same time. Erik got closer to him until their faces were almost touching, he left Charles’ hand to hold his face, looking into the deep blue eyes, finding nothing but the sweetest things there, he only really wanted one thing “Can I?” He asked so shyly, he barely recognised his own voice. 

Charles only nodded and in a second Erik was kissing him in a way he had never kissed anybody. Like he had all the time in the world, like it was the only thing he wanted to do for the rest of his life. And it was, it really was. It felt so unique and perfectly right to be there, with him. His lips the taste of apple juice and pure heaven. Charles’ hand on his knee, holding onto him, the way his hair felt like silk in his hands, the way he softly moaned into his mouth like he could barely believe he was here too. Everything was too perfect to be true, but it was true. 

Soon enough, softness turned into pure need and they were kissing passionately on his couch. Erik felt like he was dreaming, he was holding him, he was kissing him. He was in his apartment, looking like he belonged there. He had really wanted to keep it soft and romantic and everything sweet but this was turning heated very fast. It was like all his longing was coming out at once and he just couldn’t get enough of him. Without realising it, he was pulling at Charles’ sweater and Charles almost instantly took hold of his hand. 

Charles stopped the kiss, laughing nervously “This is going a bit fast.” 

“Oh fuck, no I’m sorry... I wasn’t-“

“I don’t want it to be a one night stand that’s all.” He clarified. 

Erik laughed nervously “Believe me, I don’t want it to be one either.” 

“Good, good.” He took a breath “I want you. It’s just I want to know you better. I want us to go somewhere...do I make sense?”

Erik nodded vigorously “Yes, we want the same thing.”

“Really?” He said hopefully. 

Erik kissed his hand “Definitely.” He chuckled a little “I got to tell you something.”

“Oh...” He rose his eyebrows “Some fatale flaw you didn’t tell me about? A wife in your attic? No, I know, you are a some kind of secret agent? You’d be a great 007.” 

Erik shook his head, laughing “A little less dramatic or adventurous than that. I...okay, don’t laugh at me. But the reason I bought so much flowers is not because of the flowers.”

“Sure, there’s no wife in the attic?” He looked up at the ceiling. 

“No wife but a really embarrassing crush on the florist, you may know him.” 

“Decent fellow, I recall.” 

“Well, I bought so many flowers because I wanted to see him. The flowers are very nice, they really add something to a room but I wasn’t really there for them.” 

“Oh, I mean you didn’t know how most flowers were called, it’s not really surprising. Should I be flattered?” He tilted his head. 

Erik almost blushed, almost because he absolutely never blushed “I don’t know. Are you?”

“Yes. Unless you turn out to be a serial killer then I won’t be so flattered.” He smiled. 

“I’m not. But I guess that’s what a serial killer would say so don’t trust me.” Erik shrugged. 

He laughed, shaking his head “I’m exhausted. Do you mind if I sleep over?”

“You’re not scared of me being a serial killer anymore?” He rose his eyebrows. 

“I only have 2% of fear that you are. That’s too low for me to be scared.”

“2%? That’s way lower than what most people will give me.” 

“What can I tell you?” He kissed him gently “You’re softer than you seem.”

“Not really.” He shook his head that Charles was still holding in his hands “You’re too adorable for me to resist, that’s all.”

“You’re giving me too much power, I hope you know that.” He said mischievously. 

“I don’t mind.” He answered sincerely. 

Charles kissed him again just for that. And Erik could easily get used to this, it seemed like his lips were meant for his. They were so soft and careful in all of their moves. He couldn’t compare it to anything. He gave up on trying, nothing compared when it came to him, everything felt like a first. Like a complete, new beginning. 

“I’m going to find you pajamas.” Erik said still caressing his cheek. 

Charles nodded, falling back on the sofa “Thank you.”

Erik found a very comfortable set of pajamas that his mother offered to him for Hanukkah two years ago, it was perfect for Charles. Soft fabric and white with little foxes on the pants. It was a private joke that Erik would definitely share with him when they would be a little less tired. He gave the pajamas to Charles and let him go to the bathroom while he changed in his room. He put on a simple white t-shirt and plain pajama pant. He waited on his bed, checking a file for work.

“Tada!” Charles said excitedly as he came into the room “Ready to catwalk for Prada with this incredible outfit.”

Erik smiled at him with fondness “You have never looked better.”

“I know. Foxes really bring out my eyes.” He looked down at his long sleeve. 

“Come here.” Erik’s voice was almost pleading.

“Nice bed.” He said as he lied down next to Erik “Oh and nice looking man.” His head laying on Erik’s leg “Overall, very nice. Would definitely recommend.” 

He laughed, threading his fingers through his hair “This is a nice development, indeed.” 

Charles nodded “You’ll get 20% off on the flowers now, lucky you.”

“You’re going to make so many people jealous.” 

“I know.” He smiled “I definitely have a favourite customer now”

“I wasn’t your favourite before?” He rose his eyebrow in fake shock. 

“Maybe...”

Erik kissed him “Let’s sleep.” 

“Good thinking.” He yawned. 

He turned the lights off and laid down next to Charles. He reached out to tell him goodnight but found him already asleep. Erik smiled to himself, the thought of waking up next to him tomorrow felt amazing and he fell asleep, feeling even lighter than he had felt this morning, everything made sense. He was at the right place, at the right time.

**Author's Note:**

> translation for the poem:  
“How shall I hold my soul and yet not touch  
It with your own? How shall I ever place  
It clear of you on anything beyond?”
> 
> [the title is also from a poem from Rainer Maria Rilke because i am extra, extra is the essence of who i am]


End file.
